Post by Moses on Nov 30, 2005 18:54:42 GMT -5
Posted on Wed, Nov. 30, 2005
Some proposals for the Unparty’s Critter Committee
By BRAD WARTHEN
Editorial Page Editor
I’VE GARNERED a lot of comments on my idea (see last Sunday’s column) for a new, Third Way political party — or “Unparty,” as I termed it. And some of the respondents actually like it. In fact, one even gave serious thought to my question of what sort of animal should symbolize our party. He came up with one that was actually high on my own list: the owl. As he put it, the owl is “Quiet, wise, but no-nonsense and a swift and skillful predator when the need arises.”
Good idea. I’m not ready to settle on it, but it’s a start.
On Thanksgiving, we had an item in the paper reminding us that Benjamin Franklin advocated the wild turkey as our national symbol. Ol’ Ben may have been putting us on, but that’s no reason the new Unparty couldn’t consider appropriating that.
On the subject of birds, I had already thought about the one that won out over the turkey. The bald eagle would be ideal in some ways. First, it would say we align ourselves with the nation itself, rather than with any ideological segment. Also, the traditional rendition of it, grasping the arrows with one foot and the olive branch with the other, would say that on the federal level at least, we concern ourselves with the main business of the national government — our conduct with other nations.
(Yes, I know it’s also supposed to regulate interstate commerce and such, but one thing I want to do is distance ourselves from some of the sillier battles that the donkeys and the elephants have over domestic Kulturkampf issues that aren’t properly any of the federal government’s business — such as manger scenes in town squares, and comatose patients in Florida.)
In some ways, though, the eagle is limited. For one thing, it always looks fierce. I like a mascot that can look fierce when it needs to, but the eagle doesn’t seem capable of any other expression. Also, I can’t see the eagle working well in political cartoons. Maybe that’s just because I haven’t seen it done yet. Our own Robert Ariail could most likely anthropomorphize the noble bird into characters just as hilariously human as his donkeys and elephants.
Maybe we should look beyond birds. Birds are good, given that the United States is the world’s greatest air power, and our party would be for the judicious use of that power. But as I think on cartoons — and we must be open to being lamthingyed — I’m thinking four feet might work better.
Some potential symbols, and their drawbacks:
• The Owl. Never available in the light of day. Too close an association with Hooters.
• The Turkey. Essentially American, and admirable in many ways (very tasty, for instance), but too ugly and ungainly — not to mention that “turkey” has unfortunately come to be a put-down in modern slang.
• The Eagle. Drawbacks listed above. One other: Too obvious.
• The Bull Moose. Already taken, and proven to be electorally unsuccessful, even with a strong candidate.
• The Bison. VERY American, but too, well, bovine. Any animal that’s so easy to creep up on and kill to the point of near-extinction is problematic (ditto the eagle).
• The Lion. Not indigenous, and too associated with royalty. We could go with the cougar, but I’m just not a cat person. I like dogs.
• The Dog. Noble, loyal, friendly but willing and able to tear your head off if you mean to do ill to anyone or anything that it has taken under its protection. I’m not talking Chihuahuas or French poodles, but real dogs — preferably a big mutt (symbolizing the melting pot), with some retriever, some setter, some shepherd, some chow and some plain old hound dog. Can’t be a “yaller dog,” though, because that would encroach on the Democrats’ territory, and is too suggestive of blind party loyalty, which we would abhor.
There are other drawbacks to the dog — for instance, the fact that it would make us an object of loathing among Arabs and some other cultures, but what’s new about that? The mutt has promise.
Ultimately, I remain stuck on this one. I guess, once we get this party organized (but not too organized, because that would be unlike us; we should strike a good medium between the Democrats and Republicans on that point), we’ll have to send this issue to our Critter Committee.
Or, we could just leave it to the cartoonists to come up with their own way of symbolizing us. They’ll do that anyway, unless we propose one that they find irresistible. Keep thinking, people.
Yes, this previously appeared on my blog. Share your proposals for the critter committee at blogs.thestate.com/ bradwarthensblog/.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
© 2005 The State and wire service sources. All Rights Reserved.
www.thestate.com
Some proposals for the Unparty’s Critter Committee
By BRAD WARTHEN
Editorial Page Editor
I’VE GARNERED a lot of comments on my idea (see last Sunday’s column) for a new, Third Way political party — or “Unparty,” as I termed it. And some of the respondents actually like it. In fact, one even gave serious thought to my question of what sort of animal should symbolize our party. He came up with one that was actually high on my own list: the owl. As he put it, the owl is “Quiet, wise, but no-nonsense and a swift and skillful predator when the need arises.”
Good idea. I’m not ready to settle on it, but it’s a start.
On Thanksgiving, we had an item in the paper reminding us that Benjamin Franklin advocated the wild turkey as our national symbol. Ol’ Ben may have been putting us on, but that’s no reason the new Unparty couldn’t consider appropriating that.
On the subject of birds, I had already thought about the one that won out over the turkey. The bald eagle would be ideal in some ways. First, it would say we align ourselves with the nation itself, rather than with any ideological segment. Also, the traditional rendition of it, grasping the arrows with one foot and the olive branch with the other, would say that on the federal level at least, we concern ourselves with the main business of the national government — our conduct with other nations.
(Yes, I know it’s also supposed to regulate interstate commerce and such, but one thing I want to do is distance ourselves from some of the sillier battles that the donkeys and the elephants have over domestic Kulturkampf issues that aren’t properly any of the federal government’s business — such as manger scenes in town squares, and comatose patients in Florida.)
In some ways, though, the eagle is limited. For one thing, it always looks fierce. I like a mascot that can look fierce when it needs to, but the eagle doesn’t seem capable of any other expression. Also, I can’t see the eagle working well in political cartoons. Maybe that’s just because I haven’t seen it done yet. Our own Robert Ariail could most likely anthropomorphize the noble bird into characters just as hilariously human as his donkeys and elephants.
Maybe we should look beyond birds. Birds are good, given that the United States is the world’s greatest air power, and our party would be for the judicious use of that power. But as I think on cartoons — and we must be open to being lamthingyed — I’m thinking four feet might work better.
Some potential symbols, and their drawbacks:
• The Owl. Never available in the light of day. Too close an association with Hooters.
• The Turkey. Essentially American, and admirable in many ways (very tasty, for instance), but too ugly and ungainly — not to mention that “turkey” has unfortunately come to be a put-down in modern slang.
• The Eagle. Drawbacks listed above. One other: Too obvious.
• The Bull Moose. Already taken, and proven to be electorally unsuccessful, even with a strong candidate.
• The Bison. VERY American, but too, well, bovine. Any animal that’s so easy to creep up on and kill to the point of near-extinction is problematic (ditto the eagle).
• The Lion. Not indigenous, and too associated with royalty. We could go with the cougar, but I’m just not a cat person. I like dogs.
• The Dog. Noble, loyal, friendly but willing and able to tear your head off if you mean to do ill to anyone or anything that it has taken under its protection. I’m not talking Chihuahuas or French poodles, but real dogs — preferably a big mutt (symbolizing the melting pot), with some retriever, some setter, some shepherd, some chow and some plain old hound dog. Can’t be a “yaller dog,” though, because that would encroach on the Democrats’ territory, and is too suggestive of blind party loyalty, which we would abhor.
There are other drawbacks to the dog — for instance, the fact that it would make us an object of loathing among Arabs and some other cultures, but what’s new about that? The mutt has promise.
Ultimately, I remain stuck on this one. I guess, once we get this party organized (but not too organized, because that would be unlike us; we should strike a good medium between the Democrats and Republicans on that point), we’ll have to send this issue to our Critter Committee.
Or, we could just leave it to the cartoonists to come up with their own way of symbolizing us. They’ll do that anyway, unless we propose one that they find irresistible. Keep thinking, people.
Yes, this previously appeared on my blog. Share your proposals for the critter committee at blogs.thestate.com/ bradwarthensblog/.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
© 2005 The State and wire service sources. All Rights Reserved.
www.thestate.com